Gone are the days when etiquette was black and white. There is no formal code written on when it is most appropriate to hold a baby shower. There used to be so many rules on who could host, when it could be hosted, what gifts should be bought, food served, games played, etc. But times have changed, and so have the rules for adoption baby showers. There was a day and age where adoption itself was hush-hush, so adoption showers were unheard-of. If a shower was thrown for a mother via adoption, it was almost always small, indiscreet, and after placement. But why? Why should adoptions, which are so common, not be celebrated?
Many women do not want a baby shower prior to placement, but many women do. How should friends and family decide when to throw an adoption baby shower for the expecting couple? To read more about adoption baby showers, click to read the rest at adoption.com.
For Open Adoption Education and a great community for support, visit our page Heart For Open Adoption to join the discussions.
I had fun creating some images for my Valentine, my son (through adoption) Ezra. Each with a favorite quote of mine. I may make some more, because I left out some of my other favorite adoption quotes. Hope you enjoy them.
Luckily adoption scams are rare, but that doesn’t mean they don’t happen. With the Internet, it seems that adoption scams are easier to pull off, making them more and more common. While you shouldn’t let the fear of a scam stop you from proceeding in your adoption journey, you should be aware of, and on the lookout for, a few key indicators.
For a full list of things to be on the watch for or what you should do if you find yourself in this situation read the rest of the story at adoption.com.
Whether you are considering adoption for yourself or would like to debunk some common adoption myths for friends and family, we are here to help you! Adoption can be a scary topic, especially as things have changed with how adoptions work now verses 20+ years ago. Built on fear and lack of knowledge, myths and misconceptions form. Horror stories told through the grape vine become distorted versions of the truth, and that is all people cling to. So let’s set the record straight on some of the most common myths in the adoption world. Open your mind and put your fears to rest. We won’t sugar coat the truth, but rather inform you so you can make the best decision for your family and educate your friends and extended family along your journey.
Whether adopting domestically, internationally or through foster care, there are many misconceptions about adoption. To see some of the top myths people hoping to adopt fear click here to read the whole list on adoption.com.
Protecting our children from unnecessary confusion by setting boundaries with birth parents.
Open adoptions can be full of complex emotions. I have heard of many of different types of open adoption relationships. Some are smooth sailing while many have bumps in the road. “Boundaries” is a familiar topic when adoptive parents get together and discuss issues that arise in their relationship with their child’s first family. Most of us adoptive parents don’t like to set rules because we feel so honored to have this child entrusted to us. But when you look at boundaries as rule setting, you can set yourself up for failure. Instead, boundaries should be viewed as a method for maintaining a healthy relationship. Just as my family knows not to call too early in the morning or too late at night unless it’s an emergency, birth parents should know the limits of what we strive for to maintain normalcy. Setting the boundaries with the people in our lives means we can live comfortably, avoid unnecessary surprises, and not be annoyed because we didn’t let people know how we’d like our family to work.
Navigating an open adoption and the surprising emotions that come along with it mean that sometimes we say things before thinking. Communicating with the child as well as with each other is so important. To find out some tips on how to best communicate with your child placed for adoption, follow this link to adoption.com for more. You will find tips with communicating with the child, but that when in doubt having a conversation with the adoptive parents is always a good idea too. Together you can make sure the child’s best interests are always put first.
With the hustle and bustle of the busy holiday season, making sure your child’s birth family isn’t left out can sometimes be a challenge. Open adoption is a beautiful blessing, but can sometimes add extra stress to the holidays. I am a giver. My personality has a hard time saying no to anyone, so I often feel very much overwhelmed and then run down after the holidays because I don’t want to disappoint anyone or miss any special events. My husband and I both have parents that divorced and remarried, adding even more family to each side. We each have two sides with separate traditions to incorporate into each holiday. I too was married once before and share a son with my first husband. Then add in open adoption and it’s another branch of our family.
We have become good at creative celebrations. We are so lucky that new traditions have begun forming as the next generation adds new dynamics. We have been able to extend the holidays to alternative dates in order to accommodate everyone.
To read more about how to best prepare everyone for spending the holidays with your child’s birth family, click here to visit adoption.com.